When Darkness Strikes...

When things are going perfectly, life seems to be filled with much light. But when darkness falls in whatever form, the light seems to fade. I happen to be going through a dark phase currently. This was frightful until I realised that it was simply a brief interlude and all that I needed to do was to ask God to get me through it.  Yes, brick walls often have to fall on my head for a realization to actually come to light.

It is quite easy to be a kind, loving Christian Catholic when life is going along smoothly. It is an entirely different matter when the weight of the world seems to be on your shoulders and nothing seems to be going your way. These are the times when we must depend on God to get us through. God is the answer.....to almost any question you might have.

While it may not be an instant fix, God is the long-term solution to the darkness this life can bring. He can bring light to pitch blackness, happiness to dispair, and love back to this loveless and unkind world. I have learned, yet again, that asking for God to take my free will and do with it what He wills is the ultimate cure for my darkness.

Ramblings

 Not at all sure what I am going to write about tonight; however, I made a promise to myself to write - no matter what. With moderate arthritis in both hands and wrists, my writing is going to have come in the form of typing on the computer. I love to write with a pen and paper; however, it is less satisfying especially with the additional pain that is often involved. Getting old is definitely not for the faint of heart!

I have often been asked: What is it to be a Deacon's wife? I would love to hear from other wives of deacons (in the Roman Catholic Church) and see what their answers are. But for me, the answer is first, you have to be willing to share your husband. If you must be the center of his universe, talk him out of wanting to be a deacon. The wives of deacons, while not "officially" being "called" to the deaconate, we are unofficially called to be supportive, loving, social (grimace), and pastoral to the parish that employs your husband. BTW, I use the word "employ" rather loosely - it does not usually mean an 8-5, paid position with church. It actually means 24-7, unpaid volunteer position that has high expectations including the occasional mind reading.

The wife of a deacon is not expected to be all the things I've mentioned; however, it does make the parish life and that of your husband much easier. If you don't want to attend the same parish where your deacon husband is assigned, you don't have to. However, it gives exactly the wrong message to the parishioners. They could think that you feel you are too good to associate with them. Or perhaps that you simply do not like them. You have to consider the repercussions of your actions - think ardently before making such an important decision.

I am not the most social person; however, I do make a point of trying. I allow my husband to accept dinner invitations on our behalf - as long as he consults our electronic calendar - as my initial response is actually "sorry, we can't make it". The other ministries that we are called to are relatively easy - at east in my case.

We walked into our current parish as complete strangers; however, we walked out as a welcomed addition to the parish community family. This entire group of people have become fast and loving, faith-filled friends. We have never regretted joining this parish.

So the best advice I can give to others who are considering or already in deaconate formation is this: be open to God's call to you both; communicate with one another and pray together about this huge decision; and above all - take time to be together in every way - don't forget that you were married to each other first - give it the time, energy, attention, and love it requires and deserves. 

God's blessings to each of you and until next time - kindness is cool!